Dear Diagnosis

My first blog post!!!

I don't always read Julie's posts but I did today. She started a Blogathon inviting people with narcolepsy and other chronic diseases to write a letters to themselves on the day of their diagnosis. I obviously loved this idea enough to start my own blog.

I don't foresee me writing very many posts but who knows. Maybe I'll start doing this instead of time consuming videos... eeek!

Here it goes:

Dear Billie,

Yes... it's me, your future self. I know you are scared of what the future may bring but let it be known you are still the same silly Billie. First off you need to call your mother right now and tell her you need her to drive you to your appointments in the city. You are not a safe driver. You cannot focus on two things at once let alone drive.

Stop being so stubborn and let the people who care for you help you. Yes you think you are tough and you've made it this far in life having a condition you cannot explain. You were right in your research about the hallucinations and sleep paralysis. You have narcolepsy, its not the other way around. It does not own you. Your symptoms get better once you start taking care of yourself and become middle aged. Joking, but really you will soon have the lifestyle of a 60 year old. It's fine though because you will feel wonderful (most days.)

It's OK to scream, to cry, to run until you cannot lift your feet, to nap for hours, to not get out of bed for days. These things motivate me now. I remember how bad it was and you need to go through these lows in order to gain a higher understanding.

Don't worry about what others think of you. You're not contagious and you're not going to die from this. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Stop trying to be the old you and tell your friends about the new you. I know, I'm bossy now. No more "free-spirit, living in the present." You have schedules, to-do lists and sticky notes everywhere.

The future is bright with not as much fog. Remember to smile and put a positive spin on everything you do. Continue to listen, love and grow.

Billie